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Editorial Reviews. Review. "I have bought a course from Adam before and I know he really Kindle Store · Kindle eBooks · Education & Teaching Learn more · Read for Free . Due to its large file size, this book may take longer to download . Buy Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny by Adam Khoo (eBook) online at Lulu. Visit the Lulu Marketplace for product details, ratings, and. MASTER YOUR MiND DESIGN YOUR DESTINY - Adam Khoo with Stuart download .. At this point, the river has become a raging torrent.

No part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher. Tan Mui Siang Illustrations: Robin Tan Copy Editor: Betty Khoo Kingsley. To my wife Sally who has been my pillar of inspiration and strength. To my partner, Patrick Cheo, who has been sharing my vision and continually pushing me to the next level.

This is expressed physically in sweaty palms and brow, butterflies in the stomach. Quite the opposite occurs when the confident speaker sees the audience. Unfortunately, most people have never learned how to direct and re-program the limiting patterns they run.

They are not in charge of their brains. Instead, their brains take charge of them. As a result, they will always feel that there are things they can never do, simply because they believe that it is not within their control. Or ability. Once you learn how to change a program in your brain, in fact any program, it will ultimately change how your body reacts. And you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. You too can do what you thought was impossible before, like exercising consistently until you get to your ideal weight.

Or give a powerful speech and inspire a two-thousand strong audience. It is the technology of the mind that teaches you to use the language of the mind linguistic in order to program and re- program your nervous system neuro to consistently achieve a particular desirable result. NLP was first developed by Dr.

John Grinder in the s. I was with a bunch of students of assorted ages, boys and girls from various secondary schools, and we had been sent to a residential motivational camp for teens. Looking back I can say I was at a very low point in my young life. I had just squeaked into one of the lower ranked secondary schools in the country.

Earlier on, at the age of eight, I had been expelled from a primary school for misbehavior: So I ended up in a government school called Ping Yi. Initially, I was still academically very weak. I had passed only four subjects out of eight and was placed near the bottom of the school. Not only was I poor in my studies, but I was also physically weak and mentally lethargic. Did I try? Not at all. Like all other troubled and troublesome teenagers, I was addicted to arcade games and moronic TV programs.

NLP ideas. So radical from anything I had ever been taught or shown. Somehow, something stirred in that sluggish brain I had so underutilized for so long. And we will summon all our internal resources to find a way to support that belief. We shut out the possibility altogether!

This whole new way of thinking began to excite me, to challenge me as nothing had ever done before. Like a light bulb going off in my face, I realized that all my negative beliefs were the first possibly the only thing that was holding me back.

I used to believe that I was not as intelligent as other kids. I used to believe that I was born lazy, slow, unmotivated, maybe even stupid. That no matter what I did, I would never excel in anything. I was not gifted musically nor did I show any sporting prowess. I was just so very average in those departments. What I learnt from my many mentors inspired, stimulated and challenged me.

It was only a question of strategy. Suddenly, the 13 year-old that I was had kindled in myself a burning desire to see if it was truly possible. Wow, what could it do for me? So I decided to test it out. I set three seemingly impossible goals at the time. My first goal was to top my school within a year. My third goal was to qualify for the National University of Singapore and rank among its top students. Using the principle of modeling, I went out and started to study the strategies that top students were using to get such fantastic results.

I operated from the framework that if I used my brain in the same way, I would be able to replicate their success. So, I modeled their patterns of excellence. How did they take notes? How did they stay motivated? How did they concentrate? How did they memorize so easily? How did they grasp difficult concepts? How did they tackle tough examination questions?

I started to compile all these mental success blueprints and then proceeded to install these strategies within myself. I took notes the same way, asked the same kind of questions and approached questions in the same manner. By constantly stimulating my brain like they did theirs, I inevitably started creating the same excellent results they had.

Within a year, from passing just two subjects, I scored 7As and ranked among the top ten students in my school. In three years, I topped the school with the lowest scoring aggregate and I became the first and only student from my school to qualify for the number one junior college in Singapore that year, Victoria Junior College. Within six short years, I found myself being ranked among the top one percent of students in the country.

The phenomenal results I managed to create reinforced my belief that with the right strategy I call it the patterns of excellence , anybody can mentally orientate himself or herself to achieve success in any area. The results were amazing and most encouraging. Many of those who used my strategy experienced the same phenomenal improvements in their grades as well.

While still an undergraduate I decided to write a book compiling all these success blueprints for academic excellence. So my next challenge was to be able to create success beyond the classroom. I knew that if I applied the very same principles of modeling and replicating patterns of excellence, then nothing was impossible.

My major career goals were to make my first million by the age of 26, to start and build a million dollar business and to become one of the best speakers in Asia. So again I dedicated all my time and energy to study and model the best speakers and entrepreneurs in the world.

I read over four hundred books. Quite a feat for someone who never read anything more challenging than Archie comics until ideas of personal development germinated in my brain. I read biographies of self-made millionaires and inventors, I read books on wealth creation, psychology, linguistics and personal development.

I then started putting into practice what I learnt by taking massive action. I started my first business a mobile disco which grew into event management at the age of 15, and a second business training and consulting at the age of 21 and started property and equity investing at While studying hard for my exams O levels, A levels, University I spent my free time making deals, running my businesses and taking on as many speaking engagements as I could find.

I had spoken to over 50, teachers, students, professionals, managers and CEOs in the area of accelerated learning and personal excellence. The Birth of Patterns of Excellence As my business, wealth and reputation multiplied exponentially over the next three years, my personal vision began to take shape. I discovered what the true purpose of my life all was about. I learned that what really drove me was not just the money but the intense fulfillment of being able to see the people around me realize and tap into their immense potential.

I realized that there were so many people out who, if exposed to this science of personal mastery, would also be able to create miracles in their own life. Stuart happened to be walking a very similar path to self-awareness… the rapport was instantaneous. It was a meeting of like minds. The program became an overnight sensation. Within 12 months of launching the first class, we trained over people from the ages of 16 to Results were extremely encouraging.

We had people who made over a quarter million in six months, people who had lost over 18 pounds in three months, undergraduates and post-graduates who had scored straight As. Also people who had overcome lifelong phobias, people who had overcome ingrained bad habits and addictions and people who were able to re-ignite the passion and focus in their lives.

Stuart Tan — the Model of Excellent Communicators Once an inept speaker and poor socializer who could not even establish rapport with his schoolmates, Stuart tells of how he discovered the strategies that changed his life and made him a champion speaker of the region.

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S development trainer and counselor, one would assume that I was a born communicator. I appear to be totally at ease whether I am on stage speaking to an audience of thousands or mingling socially with a group of high achievers.

But this was far from the case when I was much younger I am I was an extremely withdrawn person, so much so that I even found it tough to get along with the people around me. But the worst experience came when I was chosen to lead a team of 40 student leaders in junior college. Because of my poor social skills I felt uncomfortable communicating with everyone in my team.

I lacked the ability to bond and to establish working rapport. It seemed that only a handful of students in the group really wished me to succeed. I encountered either resistance or apathy, and eventually even those students who supported me felt themselves drained by the experience.

The pain of being an outsider in my own territory became so intense that, on several occasions when I put down by some of those under my charge in hurtful ways, I considered quitting my position. My self-esteem was at its lowest, and I remember that for a long time I had difficulty sleeping and found it really tough to concentrate. I may have had all the book knowledge but when it came to communicating what I knew and had even prepared for, I was hopeless.

I still remember one particularly humiliating public speaking experience. I was addressing a group of about 70 teachers whose average ages was probably a gazillion years more than mine. That was daunting enough! Although I had spent hours preparing and crafting every word and every joke, none of the teachers appeared entertained or even engaged. Some sniggered, more likely because I appeared to be the joke itself.

Soon, I saw some of them drift off to sleep while those still awake made funny frowning faces while pointing towards me. I nearly became homicidal. I finally left the stage after introducing the next speaker.

I had such an empty feeling inside of me. Because of all these cumulative ego-puncturing experiences, I started to believe that, for whatever reason, I just could not relate and communicate with others.

Not even normally, much less effectively! Why did I feel so nervous and anxious in front of people? Why was it so difficult to build rapport with them? Why was I not able to express myself effectively? And why was it that other people had so much more charisma and were able to build rapport and influence the people around them so easily? I felt all this pain and helplessness but did not have either the knowledge or the skills to change myself.

Never did I dream during those despondent days that I would ever be in control of my emotions or communicate as confidently and effectively as those people I admired. I must add that my mum and dad were both educators now retired and while they were very supportive, they could not help me build rapport with my peers.

That is not something any parent, however concerned or well intentioned, can do. The dramatic turnaround came when I was exposed to the awesome power of NLP through a series of personal development programs and books. My excitement and confidence grew as I learned that I had all the mental resources available to me to be a dynamic communicator.

Master Your Mind Design Your Destiny

The only thing holding me back was that I did not know the right strategies I needed to harness to get myself into action. It was heady empowering stuff — learning that if it was possible for others to become powerful communicators, then so could I.

All I had to do was to model and install their patterns of excellence. How do they carry themselves? What gives them ease and confidence?

How do they use words and the right tone of voice to win over their audience? From that point onward I started dedicating all my spare time to modeling the people around me who had exceptional interpersonal and speaking skills.

With NLP I found myself being able to take immediate control of my emotional state. I was able to eliminate fear, anxiety and nervousness using the mind conditioning techniques you will learn in the coming chapters.

Finally, I learnt how to put myself into a state of confidence and enthusiasm… ready to take the stage again. I started to put myself on the line by taking every possible opportunity to get on stage and deliver presentations. The changes that I had to make to my persona were drastic and quantum… I really stretched myself. But the results… the applause… made it all worthwhile. As a result of constantly installing and implementing all these strategies, I found myself getting more and more effective on and off stage.

I gave it everything I got. Putting myself into a totally powerful state of mind I delivered my material with pin-point accuracy and dynamism. The response was phenomenal. I felt like a star and knew then what it was like to have charisma! As these positive experiences started building up, so did my confidence and faith in my ability to achieve anything, given the right strategies.

When I returned, I felt invincible and began to set a quantum goal of becoming the public speaking champion of the Toastmasters movement, not just nationally but in the region. The first thing I did was to begin to model the most outstanding public speakers. In my very first competition, I made it to third place. Then I made it to second place in an evaluation speech contest at the national level.

The following year, I found myself wanting to win so badly. Again, I found myself taking second place in an impromptu speech competition. After becoming number two twice in a row, I was very determined to win the next time round. It was an absolute must!

So, taking all the lessons I had learnt as feedback, I channeled them towards crafting my peak winning performance. I finally blazed my way home with the Championship trophy.

It was exhilarating because, for the very first time, I was publicly acclaimed as a top speaker, and in front of a huge audience too. It fortified my belief in my speaking abilities. And winning the top prize was not only personally so satisfying. It is also immensely satisfying for me now to be in a position to help so many people make positive changes in their lives.

After receiving a specialist diploma in counseling, I had spent my free time counseling all kinds of people, from troubled teenagers to schizophrenics. Now, I add to these lost souls, people of all ages, from all walks of life. My early painful experiences and later enriching experiences combine to reinforce my belief that if a someone like myself can reach such an exceptional level of communication, then anybody can.

If he or she is given the right tools and strategies. We were not blessed with exceptional natural talents in any particular area, be it the ability to learn, speak or lead others. We were responsible for creating our own genius and success. Everything you read here is not the result of us just cobbling together a bundle of theories and principles that we had studied. The life-changing Patterns of Excellence methodology we present to you in the pages to come have been very much a part of the way we live our lives of possibility.

And the way the thousands of people who have trained with us, and under us, have experienced it. It is this same soft technology that is now available to you.

Your key to unlock the talent and energy you already possess… to create the life you want! This book is designed for only one purpose, to act as an instruction manual to your greatest resource and asset, your brain and nervous system.

Give Your Best, And You Will Get the Best My ability to discover and model some of the best strategies available came from the many books I read, seminars I attended and mentors that I have been fortunate enough to train under. And yet, I know of so many people who read the same books, attended the same seminars but who never went on to make a single notable improvement in the quality of their lives. I learned then that neither books nor seminars can make us achieve our goals, not unless WE make it work.

I believe that we get as much out of anything as we put into it. Most people wait for something external to change them, but what they must realize is that they change themselves with what they learn. I encourage you not to read this book like any other book you may have read. Rather, take these words you read as a personal conversation between us. This book and the ideas that follow cannot change your life. You are the only one who CAN, by using the ideas I share in these pages. I encourage you to fully participate in all the activities and exercises that follow.

This book has been written in such a way that it places as much emphasis on the experiential as on the intellect. BOOKS Unfortunately, while these readers may be entertained while reading or even become aware of some good ideas, they will not do anything about it. These people will read the book and try out some of the exercises that interest them. But that is just about all they do. Do they get anything out of the book? Then you have the last and final category.

They read the book, underline the key concepts and constantly refer to what they have learnt. They do the exercises diligently, and take each idea into their lives and work on it. These are the people who create a significant change in the results they produce in their lives. So, before moving on to the next chapter, I sincerely hope that you will commit yourself to not just learning but mastering these patterns of excellence.

For the upcoming chapters, I would like you to commit the time to reflect and work on the exercises given. These exercises are aimed at helping you put these principles into immediate action and reap the results you deserve. So for your first exercise, I want you to grab your pen and work on the questions below.

When you are done, I will see you in Chapter 2. Chapter Assignment What are five or more specific outcomes you want to achieve from reading this book? What limiting beliefs, capabilities or habits are currently preventing you from achieving your goals? Chapter Summary 1 We all have the mental resources we need to succeed. We merely lack the ability to control and direct these resources.

What sets people apart in terms of intelligence, thought and behavioral patterns are the neuro-connections that have been conditioned from our environment.

If we can model the patterns of excellence they exhibit, then surely we can duplicate the same outstanding results they have! Is it that easy? Well, one question I have always asked myself is this: Is there a formula for success? Do all successful individuals follow a pattern that enables them to get what they want?

And it is this. All of them take a series of distinctive steps to get to what they want. I call these series of steps the Ultimate Success Formula. Again, it does not matter if you want to be a whiz inventor, successful salesperson, inspiring teacher, pioneering entrepreneur, topnotch lawyer or astronaut. The universal steps remain the same.

There are six major steps. Follow this success formula, and you will be able to achieve anything you want. Miss any of these steps, and your dreams will never become the reality that you deserve. Step 1. Be Very Specific about Your Goal The first step to getting what you want is to know exactly what it is that you want.

This sounds simple and obvious enough. Yet, sadly, most people never seem to get what they want, simply because they are not clear about what it is they want in the first place! Well, know this: This is why most people find themselves going in all other directions, ending up nowhere. Unless you have a specific target, you cannot develop an effective strategy to get there. It will then become crystal clear to you what it is you must do to get there.

Biographies of the most successful and legendary people, again in all pursuits, show time and again that their outstanding achievements are rarely outcomes of chance. They did not have success thrust onto them. He accomplished this feat 13 years later at the age of He spent those thirteen years focusing on his game in order to take it to the level he needed in order to be the best.

At the age of 12, Steven Spielberg knew that what he wanted to do was to tell stories to the world by making movies. It was this specific goal that directed him to spend his time making home videos at the age of 12 and exposing himself to movie sets at universal studios at the age of It was these years of focused effort that allowed him to build the level of experience and skill he needed to make some of the best movies around.

Did Bill Clinton happen to be at the right place and at the right time when the Democrats nominated him to run for the Presidency? No way! It took years of focus and planning in one upward direction that won him the most powerful position in the world. It was this clear vision that motivated him to run for elections on student committees in every school he attended. In fact, at one time, he was barred from running for any more college committee positions because he was already heading far too many!

Very few successful experiences happen by chance… whether it is winning a race or a position. Almost all happen by design. Like a laser beam honing in on its target. And in moving unwaveringly towards it, we develop the resources necessary to make it happen. In chapter 11 we will focus on how you can design the ultimate destiny for yourself! Step 2. Develop a Strategy Everything is possible. It is only a question of the strategy used. Strategy The second step in the Ultimate Success Formula is to develop a strategy that will move you towards your outcome.

Again, the more specific your goal is, the easier it is to develop an appropriate strategy. You can have all the drive and energy, but without the right strategy, you will never get what you want.

By the same token, every outcome is possible, given an effective strategy. Would that be possible? You could work a lot harder, raise prices, increase trading hours, sell on-line or create a loyalty program.

Would it be achievable? Yet, if he were to completely change the way he now does his small localized fruit business, would it be possible? For instance, the strategy he could use would start by his studying how to greatly expand his market: Of course it would! With enough flexibility in our strategy, we can achieve just about anything. You still wonder how a local fruit shop can possibly expand and go global? Well, how did a British housewife create some skin and hair care products in her kitchen using fruits and vegetables and then pit herself against billion-dollar, heavily advertised international cosmetic brands succeed nationally and then globally?

She developed the right strategy, which included the right unique products. This person I am referring to is Anita Roddick who founded the multi-million dollar chain of Body Shops. They used a completely different approach in managing their time, generating leads, converting sales and creating repeat businesses.

So, taking your cue from the winners, study their strategies. If you want to be a millionaire, study the strategies of millionaires.

If you want to be a great leader, model the patterns of great leaders. Chapter 12 teaches you to craft a winning strategy by modeling people who have already achieved what you want, or where you want to get to.

Action The third step is to get yourself to take consistent action, using the strategy you have crafted. This will move you, step by step, towards your goal. Consistent action is what separates the thinkers or dreamers from the doers. Many highly educated people know what to do, they think they know how to do it, but they never do anything about it. That is why many of them end up as professionals and consultants, working for successful entrepreneurs who had mediocre grades in school.

But if you are not satisfied with your status quo, then DO something about it. Do you know someone who may be less talented and intelligent than you are but is a lot more successful? So why do so many intelligent people fail to take consistent action towards their goals? Well, first understand that what drives our actions are the emotional states that we experience.

Emotions like fear, inertia, anxiety and uncertainty paralyze us from taking action. On the other hand emotions like enthusiasm, motivation and confidence excite us and get us to make things happen. The ability to direct and manage your states for peak performance is what is called Personal Mastery.

Many people I know seem to brim over with great ideas and they have the intelligence to be successful, but they lack the personal mastery to direct their emotions into getting themselves to take action.

They may have a great business idea, but their fear holds them back. They may set inspiring new goals, but they lack the motivation to do what it takes. They may even get themselves to take action initially, but stop once they experience frustration or anxiety. When you follow your strategy and take consistent action, there are only two possible things that can happen. The first possible outcome is that you experience success by moving towards or achieving your goal. However, we know that we do not always achieve our goals.

Many of us call this failure! Does failure happen to everybody? Of course it does. All of us will fail at one point of time or another. In fact, the more action you take in life, the more likely you are to experience failure.

That is why people who experience a lot of success also experience a lot more failure than everybody else around them. Three Ways People Deal with Failure What separates people who enjoy success from the majority who end up never getting what they want is how they respond to failure.

It is what they do about failure that makes a big difference. There are three ways in which people respond to failure. They will start giving themselves lots of excuses and blame everything and everyone around them. Feeling helpless and frustrated, this first group will stop taking action and give up! They will resign themselves to their goal being out of reach and live a life of mediocrity.

Have there been times when you have done this as well? Think and write down all the instances when you gave yourself excuses, blamed others and gave up on your goal?

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Try again Failure These are the people who have a lot more determination than the first. They will get themselves to take action again. So they keep taking action, putting in more time, energy and effort. No matter how many times they fail, they just keep trying harder and harder. Will they eventually achieve their goals?

It depends. If they set small, incremental goals, they may, with enough time and effort eventually succeed. However, if they set big and exceptional goals, like becoming the top in their field, they will never be successful by just trying again and again. Because, although they keep taking action, they do not change their strategy. If you keep using the same approach to doing something, you are going to keep getting the same result.

I have seen so many professionals and businessmen repeat this limiting pattern. I know many businessmen who fail in their business only to start again and do the same thing. I have worked with salespeople who put in more time and energy every month, without significantly increasing their sales.

Again, they keep targeting the wrong customers, selling the same products and making ineffective presentations. Pretty soon, they start to get frustrated and disillusioned.

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Eventually, they too will resign themselves to believing that they do not have what it takes, and stop taking action. I once worked with a real estate agent who had been in the business for eight years. I then asked him what strategy he had used. Now, do you know of people who have fallen into such repetitive patterns in their life? Have there been times when you have fallen into this category? Think and write down all the times when you kept trying something again and again, but failed to change your strategy.

Did you get frustrated over your lack of progress and eventually quit? Pattern 3: So what is the pattern that all successful individuals exhibit? Instead, they perceive it as feedback. Either feedback that the strategy they used was ineffective or that they did not take enough action. They then use this feedback to immediately change their strategy and take action again. They keep repeating this process until they get what they want.

They do whatever it takes. It is this continuous feedback you need to help you adjust your approach until you hit your target. It is said that Thomas Edison took almost 10, attempts before inventing the light bulb. When asked how he did it, he said that he had to first find 9, strategies of how not to invent the light bulb.

He then used this feedback to change his strategy until he got what he wanted.

Bill Clinton has not been called the Comeback Kid for nothing. He had many monumental knock downs on the rocky road to his two-term Presidency, but each time he learned, he re- strategized and went back fighting. And now, finally, he is being recognized as being one of the most brilliant and most genuinely compassionate Presidents America has ever had… just as he knew he would be.

There you have it! This is the formula for ultimate success! These are four steps to get anything that you want in your life. Just know what you want specifically, develop a strategy, take action, get feedback and change your strategy until you succeed. But wait! I could teach this formula to a hundred people, but not everyone will end up putting it into practice. I have found that there are two more major elements that affect whether or not people will follow this formula.

These are our Beliefs and our Values. Step 5. Without the right beliefs in place, none of the other steps in the success formula matter. And nobody can set goals for you either. So an empowering set of beliefs is truly one of the keys you need to seal in, to set the rest of the formula in motion.

Chapter 5 teaches you how to analyze your current set of beliefs and discover if they have been empowering you or limiting you. You will also learn how to develop a powerful belief system that will drive you forward. Step 6. Our Driving Force The second key that drives the Ultimate Success Formula is our values or what we hold dear to us, and live by. Values are like emotional hot buttons that drive our behavior.

They are what we value as important in our lives. And it is the way we internally rank these values that determine the kinds of choices we make, and the actions we take. Some people are driven towards reaching their goals because of their need to feel secure. Others may be driven by a different value, like freedom.

The main reason why most people never feel driven towards their goals is because their values are not aligned and their values may even be in conflict with their goals. I once had a student a young mother who could never feel consistently motivated towards her goals of achieving her sales targets. It was later that it dawned on her that her goals and values were in direct conflict.

This internal conflict drained a lot of her energy, and held her back. She wanted to achieve her career goals but she felt guilty whenever the pursuit of her goal prevented her from spending time with her family.

We will focus on the power of values in chapter 10 and how to align them for maximum impact. The Ultimate Success Formula… in Action The Ultimate Success Formula is the most powerful series of steps you can ever use to achieve whatever you want. Individuals and corporations who follow this formula create consistent success.

Those that fail continuously are those that fail to follow any one of the six major steps. It is a billion dollar. Did he use the Ultimate Success Formula to create his success and wealth? You bet he did. He was an average student and graduated from a local polytechnic at the age of Not Sim.

What made Sim different was that he had a different set of beliefs and values. He believed that he was not just one of the crowd, he fervently believed that he was capable of a whole lot more. He set this goal at the age of 17, while still a student! It was this pre-determined goal that got him to start developing all kinds of strategies that no one else ever thought of. Did he succeed? It was a complete failure and as a result, the company lost a lot of money.

It was just too complex and costly. He had the technological flexibility to develop another strategy, a new innovation. Once again, Sim used the feedback to change his strategy and take action again. When the Sound Blaster was launched, it became an overnight success.

We tend to focus on how smart and fortunate winners are to be in the right place and at the right time. We often admire them like super human beings when they are really ordinary people.

What made them different was how they stuck tenaciously, like superglue, to the Ultimate Success Formula. When Stuart and I first came up with the idea of creating the program, we did it because we had strong beliefs and values that supported it.

We set a specific outcome and that was, we would run our first program with fifty people in November We then developed an entire strategy of how we would market and run the program. The idea was to use newspaper advertisements to draw people to a series of free previews. Once the strategy was laid out, we went ahead and took massive action.

We placed the ad, booked the seminar room and waited for the response. Over a hundred people turned up for the first free preview. Stuart and I got up on stage and gave the best, the most dynamic presentation of our lives.

When the show was over, we expected at least fifteen to twenty people to sign up. Guess what happened? Almost everybody got off their chairs and walked straight out the room.

Only one person signed up! We were far from our outcome of fifty people! Talk about not achieving your goal. At this point, most people would probably just resign themselves to believing that it was a lousy idea, and quit.

Remember pattern 1? Or they may try it out one or two more times, get the same lousy results, and decide to cut their losses and quit pattern 2. What happened was this: Another staff suggested that it was because I looked too young to be a credible trainer.

Yet another person blamed it on the room being too cramped and hot. Notice the common pattern of excuses and laying blame on something or other that most people fall into? I could have chosen to accept all these as valid reasons for not getting our outcome, but I realized that as long as I kept looking and making excuses I had no control over, it would not be useful.

So using the third pattern in the Ultimate Success Formula, Stuart and I went back and reflected on what went wrong with our strategy. We started getting more feedback by asking people who attended why they did not sign up. The following week, we held another preview for another people. Guess what? Over 13 people signed up!

It was good but still not good enough. Back we went again, got more feedback and improved our strategy. After refining our strategy yet again, we had a record 22 people sign up on the spot after the preview. Within three weeks, all 50 places were taken up for the first Patterns of Excellence training. We had achieved our goal. We then set a higher goal of hitting 80 per session within a year.

By the 7th batch of the program eight months later , we had an average of almost 80 people per session, growing to !

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Again, I hear people say that I am really talented and fortunate to keep developing such popular programs. What they constantly fail to realize is that it all began with a clear outcome and the constant use of the Ultimate Success Formula to achieve it. Anybody who follows this recipe consistently can achieve the same results — in their field.

Flexibility is the ability to constantly change our strategy and do whatever it takes within ethical bounds, of course , to get the result we want. When mum threw a bigger tantrum than her daughter! Nothing can get her to stop her tantrums. She was either very firm with her daughter or talked to her very nicely, neither of which seemed to work. Often people like this parent, lack flexibility of approach which is why they end up stuck and helpless.

Be flexible! Use this approach and see what happens! The little girl was shocked into silence. The mother repeated this strategy each time her little girl started her whining until the daughter, fearful of her mum going berserk again, simply stopped making any more demands. So, you see, with the right amount of flexibility, you can accomplish just about anything. In fact, in any situation it is often the person with the most flexibility of behaviour who will end up in control.

This is why kids tend to end up controlling their parents instead of the other way around. As adults, we tend to be a lot less flexible and a lot more predictable. Children, on the other hand, tend to be flexible in their approaches and will do whatever it takes to get what they want. The moment we become even more flexible than our children, we start taking back control over the situation and hence the outcome.

So, how can you use the Ultimate Success Formula to achieve all that you desire in the different areas of your life? In your career? In your relationships? In your finances? In your health? We will show you how in each subsequent chapter as we focus on each component of the formula. Chapter Assignment Ready for your chapter assignment? Go grab your pen and work on it right now. Were there instances when you achieved your outcome by getting feedback and changing your strategy?

Write down at least three of these instances. In what specific areas of your life can you begin putting into practice the Ultimate Success Formula to help you get what you want? Repeat this process until they get what they want.

N ow, we have said that people who succeed are those who perceive failure as feedback. They then use this feedback to change their strategy and take action once again. They keep repeating this process over and over again until they get what they want. So, why is it that so few people are willing to keep changing and taking action until they get what they want? Why do so many people quit along the way? Worse still, why do some people even procrastinate in initiating action? For most people, having more money, more freedom, more security and more success is a desire.

They think it would really be great to have it. But they can live without it, if they had to. As a result, they never take action as something more important always comes up to fill up their time.

When a goal is nothing more than a feeble desire or a wish, you will find yourself being held back by setbacks, frustration and failures. People whose goals are nothing more than desires will only do whatever is within their comfort zone to achieve it. Beyond that, they will give themselves all kinds of excuses for not doing it. As a result, they will never do whatever it takes to get what they want. There was once a financial advisor who approached me for advice.

He had been in the business for five years and had attended many seminars and read many books on sales and success. He asked me what he needed to do to get there. I sat him down and gave him a whole list of action steps and strategies he had to put in place to increase his sales.

I told him that he needed to make 20 cold calls a day, attend two networking functions a week, invest in impressive looking brochures, spend his nights targeting night shift workers who are a big untapped segment , spend his weekends presenting seminars and organizing road-shows with side walk surveys. He was also told to upgrade his product knowledge skills every month. As I went along, I could tell that doing all these things were going to stretch him well beyond his comfort zone.

He was not prepared to give up his weekends; he was not prepared to spend some late nights prospecting nor was he willing to invest money in brochures and upgrade his skills. This man is typical of those who set goals but are not prepared to do whatever it takes. To them, their goals are not a mere wish or a weak desire. They are an absolute must. When a goal becomes a must, we operate from a very different frame of mind. When something becomes an absolute must, we will do whatever it takes to get it within ethical, legal and moral boundaries, of course.

When something becomes a must, we will stretch well beyond our comfort zone and keep changing our strategy as many times as it takes to succeed. Time and again, you will notice that people who succeed are those who show this level of commitment. Most people fail this test by quitting when they hit major obstacles. The few who succeed do so because they do whatever it takes to overcome obstacles.

Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny

I truly believe that when something becomes a must for you, and you are willing to do whatever it takes, you will always find a way! It is truly amazing what we are capable of achieving if our life depended upon it. Have you ever set a goal to lose weight through constant exercise and dieting? Most people get excited and motivated for a couple of days or even a couple of weeks but pretty soon they give up and fail to get any results.

Let me ask you. If someone were to put a gun to the head of a loved one and threatened to kill that person unless you lost 10kg in a reasonable period of time, do you think you will be able to achieve it? I am sure you will. We all have the resources and capabilities to achieve any goal, it is just that we lack a compelling reason… a MUST to do it. When something becomes a MUST, it taps into our unlimited personal resources and this enables us to achieve virtually anything!

Take Your Cue from a Chinese General There is a famous Chinese military story about a general who led an army of his men into enemy territory with the mission to kill the invading army. Unfortunately, his army was outnumbered four to one. On reaching the shores of the enemy, the general ordered his men to burn all the boats they arrived in.

By cutting off all possibilities of retreat, he put his men in a situation where they had to do whatever it took to battle the enemy. Retreat was not an option. His men fought as if their lives depended upon it and won!

S erene Khoo, a Singapore wife and mother faced a personal battle no less tougher than what the Chinese soldiers faced. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in July At about the same time, her husband was told that he had to have a heart operation to save his life. In her mind, there was no other option. Serene remembered a booklet she had been given back in The title: Next came a daily routine of exercising on the beach, coupled with a healthy dose of sunlight, meditating and early to bed every night.

Today a vibrant Serene calls herself Cancer Terminator on her calling card and imports, sells and promotes organic whole and fresh foods her own new cancer-fighting diet And because Serene did not undergo invasive surgery or toxic, debilitating chemo-radiation, she never lost her breasts or her hair.

Was he just born under a lucky star? Was he a naturally talented actor? Was he at the right place at the right time? He was someone who seemed to have all the odds stacked up against him. His family was so poor that his mother had to give birth to him on the doorsteps of a school. A blotched delivery by students caused a facial nerve to be severed, leaving him paralyzed on the right side of his face.

As a result, Stallone had to live the rest of his life with slurred speech. Despite all these limitations, young Stallone dreamed of becoming an actor and inspiring millions of people through his movies. As you know many young people go through a phase of wanting to be an actor, a star… the difference between Stallone and the rest of youthful dreamers was that his dream was not a merely wishful thinking.

To Stallone, it was an absolute must. If someone believes in good faith that a Lulu Account Holder has infringed their copyright, they can request that we take down the infringing material by filing a DMCA Notice.

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